Breakthrough

“Sometimes it takes an devastating breakdown, to have an undeniable breakthrough.” Unknown

I recently wrote about the long struggle I have had with my body, and with my weight. I was pleasantly surprised that so many people, including males who are normally seen as not really having such issues, could relate to my little post. One reader also asked me how I got to the place of peace that I currently am. I decided this would be the perfect place to respond.

*Disclaimer: Parts of my story might be hard to read, so trigger warning*

https://www.instagram.com/p/Bbb7Q5mgUnb/

A thousand images flashed through my mind as I lay there on the floor. Would this moment be my last? I cried. I really didn’t know what else to do. He wasn’t heavier than me but he was stronger. I knew I couldn’t possibly overpower him, and I felt hopeless and lost. I held my breath as I waited for him to strike. That was the moment I knew I was going to die. That single moment changed my life forever. 

I think I was at my lowest then. All semblance of worth I ever thought I had in myself was gone. How had I become another statistic? How was I so stupid? The more I thought about my situation each day, the more I cried. The more I cried, the more I ate, and the more I ate, the heavier I became. I was at the very bottom of the barrel, and it would take a miracle to pull me from this hole of depression that I had fallen into.

Luckily, God put some amazing people in my life, and I have never been more grateful. Firstly, they listened as I vented, and yelled, and screamed at them for hours. It was the best feeling ever. I could finally get everything off my chest. They both comforted and scolded me. The entire time I was in that abusive relationship I blamed myself, and I was wrong. It wasn’t my fault. It took two years before I could truly believe that.

After that, it wasn’t a smooth recovery. I had my ups and downs, and my good days and bad. The start of the new me began the day that I cut my hair. Cutting your hair is always a good start, I believe. It felt like a weight had been lifted, and all the bad memories seemed to grow more and more dim with each and every snip. I worked out a balanced diet which could best work for me and my hectic lifestyle. Many times we tend to try to fit our lifestyle to a particular fad diet, and because we do not realize that everyone’s body works differently, we end up failing. This diet included a lot of fruit and nuts, which I found were much better alternatives to the usual stuff I’d been snacking on throughout the day. I also changed my commuting habits and stopped taking taxis in favor of walking, and tried to use the stairs more often than the elevator.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BbeeiVrgE2L/

The biggest part of my recovery came from God. I had been a Christian for many years and had seen and experienced wonderful things. But what God did for me, all the pain He took, this broken heart that He mended; to Him, I will forever be grateful. He helped me to see the beauty in all of my ashes. He helped me to stand on my own two feet and not be as dependent as I had been on other people. He made me a much happier person.

Nowadays, I can say that I have a pretty healthy relationship with myself, my body and with other people. I’m in no way perfect, and every now and then, I must remind myself that I am beautiful just as I am. The same goes for you. If you are going through a similar experience, don’t give up. You’re one step closer to your breakthrough. Take control of your life today. Start making the right decisions, and start inviting the right people into your life. Most important, never lose hope. Never give up. The ones who gave up will never know how close they came to victory.

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18 Comments Add yours

  1. mssparkleandglow says:

    wow this was so touching this reminds me of when i was a little girl watching my mom being abused by my dad I feel so happy that you are in a much better place now keep shining and keep using your words to encourage and inspire others love
    http://www.mssparkleandglow.com

    Like

    1. Thank you so much. This was a difficult time in my life but I’ve learned to really use bad experiences and grow from them. There’s a lesson in every ordeal

      Like

  2. Lisa V in BC says:

    “But what God did for me, all the pain He took, this broken heart that He mended; to Him, I will forever be grateful. He helped me to see the beauty in all of my ashes. He helped me to stand on my own two feet and not be as dependent as I had been on other people. He made me a much happier person.”

    I love that you are giving Glory to God in this day and age of affirmations and intentions. You are a strong woman and I’m so thankful for you that you had the support you needed to leave. I don’t know your situations, but I believe for many women, abusive relationships are somewhat like the frog in the pot of boiling water – you don’t know how bad it’s going to get as the water slowly heats up.

    Be blessed sister and Never lose sight of the One who loves you so much. You are beautiful and worthy, just the way you are!

    Like

    1. Thank you so much. This just made me smile so much. Regardless of of anything I ever achieve it will all be due to God. When I was in it, I didn’t know how to get out, but God. Thanks for visiting 😊😊

      Liked by 1 person

  3. You are a strong woman! Keep the smile on your face and continue to inspire and encourage the others!

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    1. I will try to me best. Thank you 😊 😊

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  4. What a powerful story you have! God is so good! Thanks for inspiring me and I’m sure many others! Keep telling your story! ❤️ I’ve been in a weird place with body love/hate so I really appreciate you sharing.

    Like

    1. I’m so happy to hear that you could relate to my story. Thank you so much for commenting and visiting. I’ll try to do my best.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. raisinghumanbeans says:

    You are amazing. You story is incredible!! So manydon’t have the strength to get out and find a better life, but you knew God could help you. And that is truly amazing. You are a beautiful strong woman!

    Like

    1. Thank you so much sweetie😊 😊 It has been a difficult road but through it all, God has bean amazing

      Like

  6. What a truly inspiring story!

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  7. thislifeintrips says:

    Touching read. Thanks for sharing.

    Like

    1. Thank you so much for visiting

      Like

  8. stephferg82 says:

    This is a really inspiring post. Thank you so Much for sharing your journey.

    Like

    1. I am so glad that you liked it and took the time to comment. God bless you

      Like

  9. Thank you for sharing your story. I have to say I got all choked up at one point. I’m so sorry for what you have had to go through, but as cliché as it sounds, you wouldn’t be the person you are today had you not gone through what you have. Sometimes as hard as hitting rock bottom is, it ignites something new and positive and we blossom into something wonderful.

    Like

    1. Wow. Thank you so much for the kind words. They have really touched me and you’re right, I would not be who I am today without going through all I did. 🙂🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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