Dear Death

“One day, when the pages of my life are over, I know you will be one of its most extraordinary chapters.” Unknown

Dear death, sometimes I wonder if you are a bad person. Sometimes I wonder why you choose the ones you do. SometimesI wish you never existed. Dear death, do you sit behind a desk staring at the list of the living, and once you get bored, do you delete a name? Do you know what it’s like to lose someone you love? Sometimes, I wish you did.

Last November, I lost someone very close to me; my aunt. But I only lost an aunt, my mom lost her other half. It’s hard enough for anyone to see a friend or family member die, but what must it feel like to lose your twin sister? The pain. The denial. The whole thought process is something I would never want to experience. Why her? Why not me? How do I go on with my life, when half of me has died?

Over the past two years, I‘ve also lost uncles, cousins and my grandpa, and honestly, sometimes I am not too sure how much more I can endure. It almost feels like a part of my heart gets ripped away each time the phone rings, and I hear “the pause. How do you prepare yourself for that kind of news? Is there some kind of magic potion that will make it all better? No, there isn’t. Death is just as much a part of life, as birth is, and that’s something we all need to acknowledge.

It’s astounding how abruptly life can change. One minute you‘re sitting down, sipping some coffee, and catching up on the latest episode of “This Is Us,” and the next minuteyou‘re in the ICU wondering how you never saw this kidney transplant coming. Many people believe that they are impenetrable; the man or woman of steel, and so they waste their lives doing things, which at the end of the day, do not make them happy. Life is a precious gift. It is not something to be meddled with. It is not something to be wasted. I know if my aunt were alive today she’d tell you the same thing. You need to live your present life to the fullest, and make the best out of each and every experience.

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My aunt, uncle and my mom. This was the last time I saw her alive.

I loved her outlook on life. Whether in sickness, or in health, she always wore a smile, and she never hesitated to leave you with a kind word and a prayer.Im really grateful that I was able to see her one last time before she died. I will forever remember the look on her face, and the happiness in her voice as we talked and laughed so freely. Those memories are the ones that keep me going each day. Whenever I‘m feeling down, or if I feel like I can’t go on, I remember how bravely my aunt fought to the end.

One day, I look forward to seeing her again. I look forward to catching up, and telling her about my misadventures, just to make her laugh one more time. For now though, I will live my life as best I can. I will set goals and accomplish them. I will reach for the stars, and hopefully land on a cloud. I will be happy. I know that I want to be just like her when I grow up. Because if I can be even half the person she ever was, then the future already looks brighter.

**To everyone who has lost a love one, I give you a virtual hug and a prayer. May you find peace and may your loved ones rest in peace. Don’t waste any of the moments you have been given. The best way you can honour them and their memory is to live for every heartbeat, every footprint, and every moment that takes your breath away. Bless!

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29 Comments Add yours

  1. theyoopermom says:

    This has me in tears. I’m so sorry for your loss!

    Like

  2. therunaway says:

    Very insightful post. Thank you for sharing. Indeed, we should learn to live 100%, as it was our last day, as it in fact may be.
    All the best for you and your family!

    Like

    1. Thank you for your kind words and I hope you make the best of every moment you have. 😊

      Like

  3. Roamy Link says:

    I can not even begin to put in words how your post made me feel.I feel like we know each other, like you are an old friend sitting next to me on the sofa.

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    1. Awe that is just too sweet. I am so glad you liked the post. Virtual hug 😊

      Like

  4. I feel very fortunate that I have never experienced close, personal loss *knock on all the wood*

    I have had close encounters and they are so scary. You’re right, one day you’re laughing together enjoying life, next day nothing. That’s a sobering thought.

    Sending you all the hugs as you cherish the memories of your loved ones.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much. I’m just now realizing that I just need to go for it so I have no regrets later on

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  5. yahoo2me says:

    Death is a hard reality of life and words are never enough to console someone who suffers that loss. Having said that your attempt to help someone reconcile with it is appreciable.

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    1. Thank you hun. I know I can never fully console someone but I think a few kind words go a long way😊

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  6. Umesh says:

    Such an incredible post, Thanks for sharing, yes it’s true, Death! is a hard part of life,
    I’m so sorry for your loss!
    Link text

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  7. Freddy says:

    I’m so sorry for your loss. I feel like I am lucky, having lost only so few people in my life. Though, it might be good to keep in mind that death itself is not a bad person. Death is merely the guide God sends to us, to take us home.

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    1. I never really thought about death being a guide. That’s such an interesting interpretation

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  8. neti22 says:

    Its not easy to cope with the loss of loved one and this will to will pass. Later on you will be able to be thankful for the great memories. I have so many great memories to cherish and so will you.
    http://www.madamtoomuch.com

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    1. Your kind words are much appreciated. Yes death is just as important a part as birth is. Thank you

      Like

  9. Sorry for your losses, but it’s great that you have found some inspiration & lessons through them. This brings me to recite of 1 of my favourite quotes: “Today is a gift, live accordingly” .

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    1. Wow thank you. I love that quote and will embrace life as best I can🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  10. raisinghumanbeans says:

    As I am going through a miscarriage today, I very much appreciate this. Not to be too religious but I like to think of it this way… How often do we blame God for taking someone from us, when he watched his own son suffer for our sins and die? They both understand!

    Like

    1. Wow this is such a deep comment. I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine the pain you must be feeling. I believe everything that happens can lead to other good things happening in our life, and I can only pray that your future is blessed with happiness.

      Like

  11. Denise Smith says:

    I am sorry you had to go through all that loss in this lifetime, I hope you get to a place where you can find comfort in the memories you shared. much love your way.

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    1. Thank you so much sweetie. I appreciate the kind words. 😊😊

      Like

  12. I lost my Dad in 2015 and I lost a part of me too. It has been so hard but somehow God gives me the strength to dress up and show up. So sorry for your loss. I suppose the one thing losing a loved one teaches you is how to live xxx

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    1. I’m so sorry about your dad. I hope you find peace. Yes losing people around me has taught me to take no moment for granted because you just never know…

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  13. So sorry for you loss. Your views on death are interesting as i have an entirely different take on it.

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    1. Thank you. I’d love to hear your views

      Liked by 1 person

      1. My opinion is quite unpopular to be truthful. I️ am never sad over a death because i firmly believe in a God and in eternal life. I️ know that the person who died is either in heaven or hell. They are free of their earthly confines and are taking part in a life that they have cut out for themselves, rather than this life where we don’t determine our circumstances. I️ see death as a relief more than anything. The person no long must suffer from their earthly ailments

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  14. Ann says:

    Sending you love and hugs in this difficult times. Tho we would all be there, experiencing it first hand is devastating.

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    1. Thank you for the love and the hugs. I truly appreciate them all. Bless!

      Like

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